Waking Up In Beijing
~ The Grey Boy, 2005
The Grey Boy habors a love for a girl that was his for a very short time. Even his poems are of him, a ran over frog trembling in pain.
I have scolded him. I have nagged him. I have done all I could. I do not like her because she has given my friend such amount of despair and pain. Of course he would sulk and we would not talk for some minutes, sometimes for days.
Whenever I ask him, he would say that she was the best thing that has happened to him. That he did not deserve her love or her attention. Yet in the same conversation, all I hear is how she has broken up with yet another boyfriend and found another boyfriend who drives a bigger, more expensive car.
Perhaps the Grey Boy feels that she is so precious and that she deserves much more in life that the Grey Boy and his Kenari.
How does that make me feel? That I am cheap and stupid because I spend time with him on weekends? That I am not good enough, like J? Personally I do not have respect for a person who causes a person that much misery. Perhaps I should tell the Grey Boy not to tell me about how she was so smart and beautiful and found another boy with another big car.
Read the poems he has written about the trembling frog and see how he view his relationship with the girl... him, as the ran over frog and the Merc and Bmer driving away at a fast pace.
Do I feel sad for my friend, the Grey Frog? Of course I do. Then again, I realised that perhaps he needs to torture himself before he can produce all those artwork that he so beautifully create. Perhaps it is all in his mind and there is no frog, no Merc, no Bmer, just the Grey Frog in a monologue.
posted by Otto @ 2:30 AM
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